love love love

most of my blog posts lately have been about me ranting about certain things so i'm trying to make this one full of positive vibes for a change（＾_＾）

things have been pretty good for me lately. on monday i finally received my dress that i ordered online from romwe  (which is my new favourite online store) and it looked as great as it did on the website. the quality is fantastic and it comes with its own zip lock bag for if you're travelling and you can exchange or refund it if the product has any issues eg. size being too small/large or too long/short. it's just this absolutely adorable light powder blue dress with eye prints and a really cute little turtleneck. if you've read one of my previous posts, i mentioned that this dress was in my fashion bucketlist and i'm so happy to finally cross it out. i wore it yesterday when i was out with my parents and styled it with my oversized denim jacket which was tied around my waist and my white chunky high heeled sneakers that i got from japan during my holiday there. i used my studded faux leather backpack but you can't really see it so i'll just show it some other time. 

extremely adorable dress from romwe *squeelsssss*

they're kinda like creepers but at the same time not?????
i don'treally know what they're called. 

i thought that i looked hella cute and i even did a little make up but just a simple cat eye look. nothing much. 

cat eye alexa chung style ( ^ _ ^ )

i don't like the lines to be too thick because it makes my eyes look smaller and they're already as small as it is on their own. do excuse my eyebags. insomniac problems one-o-one. 

so while i was out with my parents, i had lunch at this place called hakata ippudo which is some japanese restaurant that's pretty famous for their pork ramen. i ordered the miso pork ramen and oh my god it was so good! definitely food for the soul and perfect for a cold rainy day 

（＾ν＾）

their salmon avocado bacon rolls were good too and not to mention, good presentation as well as taste.

and after that i had green tea ice cream which was wonderful. 

i've done a little redecorating for my room too and i really like how it looks. it's not much. just one corner of my room but i think it looks great. i'll planning on doing more in the future. 

the black picture is a birthday present from tracia that she drew for me. do ignore the weird patch of white light it's just my camera's stupid flash. 

this week has been very good to me and a lot has happened. i also visited an art gallery the day before and saw many beautiful paintings done by talented locals. this one was my favorite because of the beautiful meaning behind it. 

the rest of the paintings are on my instagram account (link at the bottom of the page). okay, i'm gonna sign off now because i wouldn't wanna bore you with my life so till then xx

welcome to the idiot manufacturing factory called life

one thing i never understood was why some people are so judgemental about other people's lives and life choices even though it has nothing to do with them. 

like just recently tracia styled herself with bangs and they were the short type like grimes and hayley williams's. in fact I thought that her hairstyle looked rather like grimes's in the music video for her song vanessa. 

in fact i think she looks good in her new hair. not many people can pull off that look but she managed to. but sadly some people don't think so. personally i would love to have that same hairstyle but my hair is naturally oily so my bangs wouldn't look that nice. first of all, two people actually came up to me to ask about what's up with her new hair. one of them was even gossiping about it with someone else for god's sake. worst of all they pretended to like it and even complimented her by saying she looked like taylor swift. but then that girl came up to me asking "what's up with tracia's hair? why's she got bangs now?" and then she started telling me about how her and her friend who she gossiped with started judging her. as for the second person who asked about tracia's new edgy hairstyle, she wasn't so bad. it was just mere confusion because she hadn't come to school for the last few days and suddenly returned to see tracia with bangs. 

what i'm just trying to say here is that whatever other people's choices, it's none of your business. if you don't like it, then just shut up. it's their choice anyway. it's got nothing to do with you so why care so much? if you like it, then compliment them. if you don't, then just don't say anything. if you don't like someone's new hairstyle or what they're wearing, then don't look at them. simple as that. it's not as if it's your own appearance instead of someone else's. 

nobody's forcing you to look at them. 

sure you can give them positive criticism like saying how maybe you prefer something else but don't criticize them in a way that you're saying as if whatever choice they made was a mistake. 

this is why people are so afraid of making different choices and doing what they like. they're afraid of being judged. i'm way over that. i used to be that way until i realized that life is just too short to live with a fear of being judged. i do what i want because it's what i want and what i want doesn't matter to anyone else. just like that dr. seuss quote says "those who care don't matter and those who don't care do"

my friends are okay with my choices and don't tell me that i need to change them. just like how i'm the same with them. i only give my opinion when they ask for it. like seriously. the world is full of fakes who only pretend to like you but talk shit behind your back. it's all pretty stupid but then again that's life and life is full of brain dead idiots. 

stop the world, i wanna get off

i am pissed off and annoyed. in fact, you can say that the best way to describe my mood at the moment is "3000% done" and i know that it's mathematically impossible to be 3000% done with anything but generally i don't give a damn. that's how done i am right now. 

my best friend just told me about something that happened to her recently which made me feel this angry and i thought that i ought to share my thoughts on the certain subject. 

so here's the deal. tracia goes back home via a transporter with a bunch of other people from our school and other schools too because her parents are probably too busy to actually pick her up. sometimes it's really packed and there isn't enough space for everyone which was the case for this situation. she eventually had to sit on this guy's lap to save space and this barbaric idiot decided to dry hump her. now if you read my blog posts frequently, you're probably rolling your eyes and going oh god not another feminist rant again and yes it is just that so bear with me please this one is important. i don't even know why tracia gets so many feminist problems. it's probably because of her ravishingly good looks. 

so anyway, the guy started dry humping her which made her feel really uncomfortable considering the fact that he's two years younger than her and has a girlfriend. plus, her head kept hitting the roof of the car and he did nothing about it whatsoever. she yelled at him to stop obviously. i mean who wouldn't, right? and here's the sick part. her "friends" a.k.a. her transport buddies just laughed and did nothing about it. in fact one of them even told him to not listen to her and go on. 

at this point, i'm pretty sure tracia felt really angry and violated. i wouldn't blame her. so she punched the guy really hard and finally he stopped. this just pisses me off so much. first of all, what makes you think that you can do that to a girl? do you have no morals at all? are you like some kind of animal that just shags anything that it likes? this is just disgusting. and the fact that nobody did anything about it makes it worse. this isn't a fucking joke. he just sexually assaulted her and you all did nothing about it and just laughed?¿ what kind of people are you? how do you even live with yourselves? if i ever saw anyone getting sexually assaulted — even if i don't know them —i would still at least try to help them. 

honestly if i was in tracia's position, i would have done a lot worse to the guy than just give him a lame punch. i swear i would decapitate his head off and give him hell. this shouldn't happen to anyone. your fucking negligence is the reason why rape culture is a thing. honestly this was how i felt when i heard all this from tracia. 

this just really sickens me. i don't even understand why they're her friends. in fact i don't even understand how they even have friends. at the moment i'm so done with them that i wished i was an octopus just so i could facepalm myself with eight hands all at once and also to slap them all at once with eight hands. 

this is just disgusting. if anybody ever experiences something similar to this, don't be afraid to stand up for yourself and tell the guy to stop whatever he's doing. and if he doesn't, then elbow him in his crotch and break his nuts. sexual assault isn't a joke and feminism should never be taken lightly. 

i'm going to sign off now with this picture of how i looked like the entire time typing this. 

remotely interesting life update

you could say that a lot happens in my life although i beg to differ. my life is pretty boring. it pales in comparison with other people's. so here i am to maybe give all of you an update on my remotely interesting life. 

lately i've been trying to be healthier because not only would it help me to lose weight but it would also make my body more energized and less tired all the time. the main reason for becoming healthier is to lose weight and become more fit and i realized that eating healthy is more effective than starving myself all the time like i used to. starving yourself slows down your metabolic rate however eating healthier foods speeds it up. a higher metabolic rate helps you burn fat faster so that's what i'm aiming for. 

so to boost my metabolism, i've made some changes in my diet. i've been eating similar meals almost every single day. they're pretty much the same things which are parsley and garlic pasta with an egg fried in olive oil, salmon sautéed in olive oil with green beans, and tomato basil pasta with button mushrooms. i eat pretty much these same meals over and over again. i've also cut down on carbs especially at night so i mostly just eat the salmon with green beans for dinner or blend some fruits into juice if i want something lighter. some of my favorite juices are the banana, apple and pineapple smoothie, papaya and pineapple, and strawberry, pineapple and banana. my daily meals mainly consist of olive oil and fibre. the olive oil helps keep my hair healthy and growing fast while the fibre keeps my bowels clean. 

also i've been drinking lemon water instead of regular water to help me detox. i also excercise regularly by jogging or going for a walk. it's not much but at least it's something. here are selfies that i took with a neighborhood cactus on one of my walks. 

nowadays my snacks are much healthier too. i've been bringing apples to school for my recess rather than the greasy but heavenly delicious cafeteria food. i also snack on cucumbers. i've always loved cucumbers anyway so it's no big deal. i even used to use cucumber conditioner hahahha. 

i've been trying to cook some new recipes too. just yesterday i made sour cream and salmon pasta. it was just as good as i expected and i might make some again on monday to bring to school for recess and to share with my friends. 

i still have cheat days every once in a while when i snack on maltesers and eat really buttery delicious breakfast food and johnny rockets. 

feelings wise, i realize that i kind of feel a little more on the emotional side lately? i'm not sure why that is but sometimes i feel like people don't really notice that i'm more emotional than usual. i know it's selfish for me to wish that people were more aware of my feelings but i guess i'm just extremely bitter and selfish. i just hope things get better soon. in the meantime, i hope things are good for everyone else too. 

none of my business but an entitled opinion

i'm not sure if it's just mood swings that are causing these feelings but i seem to get really aggravated and angry these few days very easily especially over certain issues that have to do with feminism. 

so my best friend recently gave her number to this guy and lately he's been harassing her by sending her texts that make her feel uncomfortable. now the thing is, these texts would have been perfectly fine if the both of them had known each other for some time rather than a short time span of less than a week (approximately two days). 

from what she's been telling me, he's been sending her texts that have the word "baby" in them and other things that aren't exactly the type of things that a person would send to someone just after knowing them for a few days. the messages even make me uncomfortable reading them. i know it's none of my business but i just think that it's absurd. 

it's absurd for him to send such things to a girl whether he likes her or not. they're not even close. they've never spoken in person before. yet he sends her these things that make her feel uncomfortable.  it's just wrong. even if they were close, he still has no right to send her messages where she feels discomfort in reading. in fact, no boy should ever do this to any girl. it's just plain violation of her feelings. 

girls, please don't let idiotic immature boys like that make you feel uncomfortable. stand up for yourself. no one should make you feel violated. especially not a silly immature boy. not anyone at all. if you ever experience something like this you should tell him that you don't feel comfortable with what he's doing and that he needs to respect you and your opinion. if he doesn't listen, then block him. block him, report him, tell someone. do whatever it takes to stand up for your own rights. 

we need feminism!

so yesterday i was pretty ticked off about something. i was wearing this really cool dress that i had gotten from h&m. the pastel ice creams on it were ultra cute and i thought that i could wear it with my black tights since it was too short to just wear it as it is and i didn't feel like wearing shorts on that day. 

the only problem with the dress was that the holes for my arms were pretty big. since i was too lazy to put on a camisole, i decided to just not care and wear the outfit without a camisole. so technically you could see my bra but only if i lifted my arms up. other than that, it wasn't even noticeable at all.  

i got called out by my mum for being inappropriate and said that my dressing was explicit. the only reason why she even saw my bra was because she was sitting next to me while we were having lunch and obviously i had to lift up my arms in order to eat otherwise I'd just look plain ridiculous. 

she started nagging me about how some men who might be extra horny would have raped me if they saw me dressing that way (ie. if they saw my lacey bra). i found this just stupid. let me just say that the reason why i didn't want to put on my camisole wasn't because i wanted to show off some skin to get boys's attention. it was because i have sensitive skin that gets easily prone to heat rashes when it's hot. it was a very hot day yesterday and my heat rashes were acting up so to not burden myself. i thought, hey! maybe i don't have to wear my camisole since it'll just make my heat rashes worse and besides my bra isn't that obvious anyway! but nope! i still got nagged at by my parents. my own parents for god's sake! 

here's what i think. i do not have to dress a certain way that discomforts me just because some men can't control themselves and act impulsively. stop blaming the victim. stop blaming women. it's not our problem that you can't control that bulging erection of yours. it disgusts me how boys can run around shirtless all day and it's no big deal but when a girl does it it suddenly makes her a slut? grow up people! boobs are just fat on the chest. i see tons of men with man boobs going around shirtless and nobody says a thing. so why is it suddenly explicit when it comes to women? 

and don't even get me started on why rape is okay because the guy "couldn't help it" because "the girl was asking for it by wearing something so skin revealing". please take those two excuses, wrap them up in a bundle, and then shove them up your own ass. it's not our problem if you men can't control your sexual fantasies. stop blaming others for your own faults. we see you men running around shirtless all day but we don't rape you because at least we have the decency to have some self control. honestly if rape is okay because a guy can't control his sexual urges then murder should be okay too because i'm having my time of the month. 

i'm just really worked up about how we don't have enough feminism in our lives. all i did was not wear a camisole and it earned me two long lectures. at least i put on a bra and it's not like i would lift my arms up 24/7 like hey check it out! you can see my bra and while you're at it maybe you could smell my pits too! 

women should be able to dress however they want without having the need to worry about whatever anyone thinks of the way they look. they need to be thought of as human beings rather than just sexual pleasures for men. we need equality. that is why we need feminism. 

kindness

apparently a tiny act of kindness can go a long way. it's amazing to see that you're able to put a smile on someone's face just by being kind to them. 

so today in school, during recess, my best friend, tracia, went to buy food. she ordered her usual dish which is minced lamb in a hot dog bun. since the school is too cheap to let us use plates, they serve our food in a piece of brown paper which we have to carry our steaming hot food in back to our table. now note that the workers at the cafeteria always prepare our food fresh from the grill so it's piping hot. tracia accidentally loosened her grip and dropped her food onto the ground before reaching the table because it was too hot and she got really upset about it. 

seeing as she was incredibly upset that her food and the money that she spent on it had gone to waste, i did something that i knew would probably lift her spirits. i went over to the lunch lady and ordered the exact same dish that she dropped and paid for it then gave it to her. her happiness came to me as a shock because all i did was just a small act of kindness and she treated it as if it was such a big deal. 

i always did this even back in elementary school. one time when my best friend back in year three dropped her bowl of noodles i went ahead and bought her another one. it was just something normal for me to do. but according to tracia no one had ever done that for her before and according to my other friend, joyce, it was the first time she saw someone do something like that. 

so what i'm trying to say here is spread a little kindness as often as possible. even if it's just something small like complimenting someone or buying food for them after they've dropped theirs, the tiniest acts of kindness can make someone's day. even though it probably doesn't mean much to you, it'll probably mean the world to them. trust me. just try telling the next three people you see that they have a nice smile and marvel at their response.